Shame is Relational. Shame can be seen as a spectrum of feeling – embarrassment, shame, humiliation, mortification – and is different from guilt. Why a spectrum? When you look at shame that one feels because you judge yourself as inadequate it is qualitatively different and has different implications from the shame caused by sadistic abuse. Embarrassment is mildly related to shame, and mortification is at the level of wanting to die, in the moment of shaming. Guilt does not weigh in about one’s self-worth, its about regretting something one has said or done. Contempt and grandiosity are both reactions to actual or potential shaming and loss of sense of self. Contempt for self – that self is less than worthwhile is often difficult to hear and seemingly impossible to challenge.
When we look at Shame as a spectrum, we are better able to tailor our reflections in a proportionate manner and appreciate the extent to which physiology and affectivity are highly linked. As therapists we need to take care to be in a certain frame of mind, create a shame-free frame, with empathy and a sense of not knowing, being non-judgemental, aware of our own shame, and a readiness to create a right-brain interaction, in order to give Shame, light and air (DeYoung, 2015) and restore in varying degrees a sense of Self.
In this webinar Dr Joan Haliburn discuss Shame, the spectrum of Shame, identifying and working with shame in psychotherapy. Dr Joan Haliburn will also look at what happens when Shame is Dissociated or when Shame blocks the process of therapy, and how one proceeds to rectify this and restore Self.
Video: The Shameful Self - Its Restoration In Psychotherapy
PPT Slides: The Shameful Self - Its Restoration In Psychotherapy
Assessment Component
Dr Joan Haliburn is a Consultant Child, Adolescent and Family Psychiatrist, trained in the Conversational Model of Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy, in the Systems Model of Family Therapy and in Attachment Strange Situation. She is in private practice and is a faculty member of the Complex Trauma Training Unit, University of Sydney at Westmead Clinical School. She has been involved in psychotherapy research and writing since graduating in 1987. Her most recent book ‘An Integrated Approach to Short Term Dynamic Interpersonal Psychotherapy: A Clinician’s Guide’ 2017 is used in the short-term therapy training course. She has also co-edited “Humanising Mental Health Care in Australia” 2019 and has authored numerous papers in local and international journals.
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